Day 71, Happy Halloween!

In addition to being Halloween today is the two month mark for me. Two months smoke free and I lost track of how long it's been since I took Chantix. (I tapered off and quit the drug before the prescribed twelve weeks.) So far so good!

Last night I was watching television after a good meal when it hit - a five point six earthquake in the South Bay. I've been through my share of quakes but this one was a roller that lasted a while. The kind that makes you think "Should I put on some proper clothes?" "No, really, maybe I should get up in case this one is serious." If you have to stop to think about what to do it is no small quake. Of course it was not serious but a reminder that eventually the next big one will come.

Day 70, Hangin in There...

Something about the numbers on GetQuit stand out today - 60/$450.00. Sixty days smoke free and a not inconsequential $450.00 saved. Think I'll treat myself to a little dinner out. I've been wanting to try the special at Home just blocks from my apartment. Otherwise feeling a bit better today but it is still early.

Chef's Early Bird Special

Everyday, from 5 pm to 6 pm.

3 course prix fix menu & glass of wine.

Ask your server about today’s special.

No substitutions, please.

Day 69, Dragging...

I don't know what is wrong but I can hardly stay awake this morning. I got plenty of sleep but today I am just dragging! Which makes Monday even worse than normal. Aside from Friday's concert it has been an uneventful weekend. Anyone see the 49'ers Saints game? Painful...

Fifty nine days smoke free and $443.00 saved.

Day 67, Rare Weekend Post

Well I did something last night I had not done in y e a r s. I went to a concert. A very loud, hot, sweaty, "rock" concert. And it was great! I met a nice woman there and we hopped in a cab after the show in search of a night cap. It is extremely rare for me to meet someone with similar taste in music let alone know and love these obscure bands. So what a pleasant surprise. However, it all comes with a price and today I am paying it if you know what I mean.

Specific to this blog the great test was her choice of bars for our nightcap - Amber lounge. It is a rare legal smoking bar and believe you me people take advantage of the opportunity. Of the whole messy half drunken crowd yours truly was the only person without a cigarette hanging from his lips. Thanks to Chantix and a lot of willpower.

Fifty seven days smoke free and $428.00 richer.

Day 66, Friday Already?

I was busy yesterday and (obviously) didn't post. The transfer/promotion is final and I moved to the new department. It is peaceful and quiet and I can focus on the tasks at hand. And they tend to treat people more like valued professionals. There has been no specific discussion around salary so I don't yet know if that has changed. I do know Human Resources did a market survey for this wholly new position so it will be interesting. Hope it didn't go down!

(Ah-oh, I think someone put "leaded" in the decaf this morning.)

Fifty six days smoke free and $420.00 saved and still flying solo (without Chantix).

Day 64, Wednesday Already?

"Hump day" again already. I am so busy in the office I barely notice the time fly by. Fortunately keeping busy helps with the quit. Having quit the Chantix prematurely I am experience more frequent and stronger desires. Something akin to "tuggings" on the Maggie scale, I think. Nothing I can't handle though and I remain stubbornly smoke free.

GetQuit reminds me I am fifty four days smoke free and $405.00 richer.

Day 63, Wagon Ho...

I have been planning a trip North to Seattle for some time. Come late November I'll be an uncle again and have been looking forward to meeting my new nephew and celebrating his brothers third birthday. And, rather than hop on a flying bus for the trip the idea of a train ride took root. I have never taken a train and in my research I learned of the "Sleeperette" - a little room for sleeping and relaxing in private. Well, how fun is that? The train leaves San Francisco at about ten at night and arrives in Portland at about four the next afternoon. And I believe the scenery en route is spectacular. I could continue on to Seattle but as I have never experienced Portland I wanted to stay a couple of nights as a mini vacation in a vacation. After much searching I discovered a great hotel downtown near the Pearl district. I can't tell you how much I am looking forward to the time away from work and worries and just relaxing and decompressing and exploring another city.

What does all this have to do with quiting smoking and Chantix? When I started all this I was still smoking. I can't tell you how I dreaded the idea. I wanted to take the train and have a weekend in Portland but one thought continuously ran through my mind: "How can I possibly survive the train trip?" The train is non-smoking and the only chance of having a cigarette is during stops when there is a designated smoking area. Not all stops or platforms allow smoking, according to my research. Well, I was dumbfounded and almost fearful of the idea. Not have a cigarette when I wanted or needed one? On vacation? On a train? I couldn't do it. I wouldn't.

But now I am.

Fifty three days smoke free and $398.00 more in the 401(k).

Day 62, Happy Monday!

Is it me or do the weekends seem to just disappear? We had surprisingly nice weather so I spent a fair amount of time out and about. Also managed to cook dinner Friday with a friend, a little shopping, fantastic brunch at the nearly world famous Dottie's (grilled cornbread and jalapeno jelly - yum!) and a failed attempt to fix the cantankerous door handle on my old Jeep. Through it all I remain smoke free and flying solo having quiet the Chantix early.

Fifty two days smoke free and $390.00 saved. (I am putting my savings into the company's 401(k) plan.)

Day 59, Almost Two Months...

I started taking Chantix fifty nine days ago and quit (ahead of prescribed duration) two days ago. Still, I have managed to remain smoke free for forty nine days now. Nothing much to report; looking once again to a quiet weekend and a little extra rest. Strangely, although I have quit the drug I have woken the last two mornings at around three. I thought it was a fluke but it happened again this morning. After a while I manage to sleep until the alarm sounds but still. All that complaining I did about Chantix messing with my sleep my not have been fair. I am under more stress than usual; maybe its that.

Bought gas this morning which I do every six weeks or so. (I live really close to work and drive little otherwise.) Ouch, $3.35 a gallon - bend over! Just two weeks ago the same station was $3.18, a bargain. Clearly the run up on crude is affecting the local pumps.

Have a great smoke free weekend everyone!

Day 58, Getting Good At Quiting

I forgot to bring my Chantix to work yesterday. Since dropping to half a pill a day I was taking it after lunch. By the time I got home I felt OK so I didn't bother taking it. I still feel OK this morning and left it at home so I'll try quitting which makes yesterday my first real day without it. No serious cravings although I think about them (cigarettes) occasionally. I suppose that is to be expected given that I smoked thirty or more times a day for over twenty years. Thoughts of such long-ingrained habits are slow to fade.

Today marks forty eight days smoke free and $360.00 saved.

Day 57, Too Much To Do...

It's Wednesday already and my calendar is filling up with meetings and deadlines. Hopefully, I can buckle down and get some real work done so I can relax this weekend. My job is a little too much sometimes which was one excuse to have a smoke. "For the stress" I thought. Yea, adding to it! Well I have a mountain of things to do so I'll leave you with "Happy Hump Day!"

Forty seven days smoke free and $353.00 saved.

Day 56, Better All the Time

After my "drug holiday" Friday I have not consistently maintained the one milligram per day of Chantix. For the past two days I have taken only half a pill and seem to be fine with that. I also quit taking the Wellbutrin after all these years and feel better. I often felt like hell and wondered if the antidepressant was contributing to that. So it seems. Anyway, I am starting to feel like myself again without all the drugs. Now if I could muster the will to get to the gym...

Forty six days smoke free and counting!

Day 55, Happy Monday...

Just where does the weekend go? I feel as though I just left the office and here I am back at work.

Friday I took a drug holiday. That is, I did not take any of my prescriptions. It was amazing how well I felt Saturday. I didn't realize how all this damn drugs affected me. No, I can't stop taking all of them but the Chantix can go as well as the so-called antidepressants. Am I ready to fly solo? I don't know but I don't like feeling so "off" so I will try tapering down from the one milligram per day I started last week to half that. And the Wellbutrin is next.

Forty five days smoke free and $338.00 richer.

Have a great week everyone!

Day 52, TGIF All Over Again

Day two of the half dose of Chantix also went well. Yesterday after work I did a couple loads of laundry and enjoyed leftover lasagna before Ugly Betty. Since I started an hour early today for a conference call I went to bed early last night. And boy did I dream! Of the three or so main dreams the most memorable and surprisingly pleasant was that of a flight out of SFO headed to Indianapolis. We didn't make it. In fact, after a protracted and wild attempt to escape the effect of freak tornado's we managed a safe crash landing in the San Francisco bay. It was the most intense roller coaster ride I have ever experienced. If commercial airliners can endure what this one did then hats off to Boeing.

Forty two days smoke free and $315.00 saved, according to GetQuit.

Have a great weekend!

Day 51, Still Full!

My first day on the half dose of Chantix went well. Perhaps I thought about smoking a little more but suffered the "off" feeling and poor sleep less. After work I went to a friends house who is infamous for cooking enormous quantities of good food. We had been planning a lasagna dinner for a while and finally made it happen last night. Of course, ten pounds of lasagna smothered in home made bolognese sauce would not do. While the lasagna baked and bubbled away in the oven we made a scallopini "appetizer" out of thin-cut pork cutlets he had pounded out ahead of time. Yum! Breaded, fried pork covered with mozzarella and bolognese stacked two high per serving. In my opinion this was a meal in itself. (I am not a big eater.) Plus delicious little red, yellow, and green stuffed peppers. Needless to say I waddled home a few pounds heavier with leftovers to boot!


Today marks forty one days smoke free and $308.00 saved.

Day 50, Cutting Down

Last night I took only half the Chantix. As mentioned yesterday I have decided to give one milligram per day a try. For some it has been the "sweet spot" and I am hoping it will mitigate some of the side effects while providing the welcome assistance during my quit. I managed to sleep so well that I overslept this morning so I had better set the alarm again. (Not usually a problem.) I really think the combination of Chantix and Wellbutrin has caused me some unique issues. Hopefully that will be a thing of the past.

Forty (40!) whole days smoke free and $300.00 saved. For some reason I like seeing multiples of seven and ten pass by. Just seems more like a milestone I guess.

Day 49, Can't Go Back

Last night I elected to skip the evening dose and managed to sleep very well without the aid of Benadryl. Not a very scientific approach with only one data point but hey, I got a good nights sleep. So now I am considering cutting the dosage and taking a half milligram morning and night as I just feel "off" when taking the full dose. I could run this by my doctor but it takes a couple of weeks to get in to see her and I know she has little experience with Chantix. Who knows...

Anyway today I am thirty nine days smoke free and I have not spent $293.00 I would have otherwise. No real cravings but I do have the persistent feeling that I miss them. But we can't go back now, can we.

Day 38, "Blah..."

Well Monday has arrived too soon as always. I had a reasonably productive though uneventful weekend. Apparently it is Columbus Day and many are off. Lucky...

Not much to tell; pretty "blah" today. But I am happy to report I am smoke free for 38 days now. I am about half way though my second-to-last weekly pack of Chantix and have been thinking about forgoing the third month and tapering down with the final pack. Lord knows it has made quiting easier than I though possible but I am not pleased with the side effects and taking drugs in general. Just a thought...

Day 36, Steady As She Goes

The cocktail party was canceled due to a death in the hostess family so I dropped by the local watering hole and had a few with the regulars after work. A quick bite to eat and a little television and I was in bed early and slept well. This morning I am knee deep into the chores and about to have a little breakfast. Looking forward to getting the apartment spruced up and ahead of the game for the work week.

Thanks to Chantix I am thirty six days smoke free and $270.00 richer.

Day 45, TGIF!

Thank goodness it's Friday. And I have a full dance card this weekend. This evening after work I have been invited to a little post-work cocktail party. Nothing fancy but a chance to meet friends new and old. Tomorrow I will attempt to cram a weeks worth of chores and errands into a single day then Sunday I am volunteering for a local charity at a neighborhood street fair.

Through self medication I managed quite a bit of sleep last night. A couple extra glasses of wine and a Benadryl works wonders. I did have one long, surreal, convoluted Chantix dream. At certain points I was dreaming in my dream. And with such visceral effect I had trouble sorting out real from imaginary this morning. In fact at one point I woke with a start believing, feeling that the events in my dream within a dream were in fact very real. Of course they were not but it was unnerving.

Since I am not going home right after work and will be drinking I elected to take public transportation this morning. It was such a pleasure to be among people and see the city with a leisurely perspective for a change. I just missed the MUNI J line so I took an historic F line car which noisily makes its way down Market Street. I forget to appreciate where I am.

Thirty five days smoke free and $263.00 saved according to GetQuit. It's good to be reminded of that, too. Have a great weekend!

Day 44, A Kings Ransom for Some Sleep

I would give a kings ransom (whatever the hell that means) for some honest sleep. Note the time this post hits. Before 2 AM if I type fast enough. I normally go to bed between nine and ten at night and wake between five and six in the morning. Not because I like it that way, I am nocturnal by nature. My job requires it. Now, I have ways of forcing sleep through self medication of alcohol and lately Benadryl but the effect the next day is awful. So last night I tried it more or less au natural. I am beginning to hate Chantix. No, I don't want to go back to smoking. That really has not been a problem since my quit date. But damn!

Day 43, Back and Forth...

Yesterday I beat the alarm by over an hour. Today I hit the snooze four times. Back and forth, up and down. (More Chantix dreams but nothing memorable.) Oh well, at least I am thirty three days smoke free and $248 richer. Now if only I could muster the will to get to the gym...

Day 42, Cranky Today

I'm somewhat cranky today and notice I get that way more often lately. It does not help that my promotion seems to have fizzled. Yesterday was supposed to be my first official day in a different department. I have had meetings with my new manager, whom I like, and packed up my desk only to discover there is no new desk assignment. So I am in limbo of sorts. This is after three and a half years of hard work and toil and frankly below market compensation. But it is a very good, stable company. So I was looking at this as appreciation for my patience. Grrr...

Long, crazy Chantix dream last night. Sad too though not for me but the people I was trying to help. A very dysfunctional family with serious issues. Weird, huh?

32 days smoke free and $240.00 saved...

Day 41, Now Get Back to Work

Well, the weekend ended far too soon and I am back at the office. According to the helpful GetQuit "dashboard" thanks to Chantix I have been smoke free for thirty one days and saved $233.00. Woo hoo - a whole month! It was a little tough being on a mini vacation with a smoker. Especially considering all we did was eat, drink, and sleep a lot. The fresh cool air surrounded by redwoods was very conducive to sleeping in. I nicknamed the cabin "the tree house" 'cause it was eighty four freakin stairs up the side of a hill. And with windows all around you looked out into and down upon the forest. I'll try to get some photos posted. But sadly for now it's back to work.